Quiet - Book Excerpts & Review

Quiet

The power of introverts

in a world that can't stop talking

Susan Cain

In this wonderful book the author strongly advocates to understand introverts better and give them suitable opportunities to flourish. This will not only benefit them, but also the company where they work and the society in general.

The book gives insight to essential difference between the personalities of Extroverts and Introverts and how both have an important place in the well-being and growth of society.

Extroverts are sociable and outgoing. They like to interact with others and enjoy being in the spotlight. In search of success, extroverts are prone to excitement and euphoria. They need acknowledgement from the people and strive for quick successes.

Introverts, in contrast, prefer to be in calm situations and like to think long and hard about things. The introvert’s tendency to concentrate on experiences and sensory stimuli enables them to effectively undertake and complete artistic and intellectual projects.

While extroverts tend to have many superficial acquaintances, introverts prefer fewer, albeit deeper, friendships. Extroverts tend to like noise and need stimuli, whereas introverts mostly prefer to be alone and think.

Many introverts are highly sensitive, often responding strongly to their environment.

The vast majority of introverts are highly sensitive. Extroverts, on the other hand, rarely possess this characteristic. Highly sensitive people process information from their environment in a very thorough way. Tragedies and cruelties also have more of an emotional impact on them.

Introverts have a strict moral conscience: they know how their behaviour affects others and they take their mistakes very seriously. It means a lot for them to be seen positively by others, which makes it unusually trying for them to meet new people.

This sensitivity also helps us differentiate between introversion and shyness: shy people are afraid of negative judgment, whereas introverts just prefer quiet environments with little stimulation.

The difference is cerebral: introverts’ brains show a stronger response to external stimuli.

We all feel comfortable in different situations. Everyone has their own definition of comfort zone and these definitions can have stark differences.

Our reactions are controlled by brain’s emotional switchboard – amygdala. It is where our sensory organs send every stimulus received from the outside world to determine our response about it. The amygdala of high-reactive people is extremely sensitive. These people prefer low-stimulation surroundings, such as libraries, and mature as reserved and thoughtful personalities.

On the other hand, it is difficult for the people with low-reactive brain, seek out more stimulating environments, eventually becoming nonchalant, lively extroverts.

Introverted children are like orchids: they only thrive in the right environment.

Not only biology and genetics shape our temperament, our experiences over the course of lives do too. Extroverted children thrive just about anywhere and are virtually incapable of being thrown off track. Introverted children however, in a supportive environment, flourish whereas in the wrong place, they close up.

Parents can better attend the needs of their introverted children by treating them with respect and empathy and engaging with them. It is crucial for parents to recognize their child as an introvert and to understand uncomfortable situations he or she faces, especially those involving large groups.

With right upbringing introverted children build up self-confidence and learn to develop their skills constructively. If pressured, overstimulated or dismissed, they can suffer from depression or respiratory disorders.

The ideal of the successful extrovert prevails in the Western world.

Extroverts are considered more qualified and intelligent because of their sociability, also they’re perceived as more interesting and cooperative. Extroverts are often seen as being more physically attractive and nonchalant. The introverts, on the other hand, are seen as pale, nondescript and awkward. Based on this way of seeing things, extroversion is considered favourable for success in the Western world.

This trend is why professors at the Harvard Business School make it their mission to turn every one of their students into an extrovert.

Japanese and Korean universities show a completely different picture: average students there prefer studying all day to bar-hopping with friends.

Flipping the switch: introverts can also act like extroverts.

Time and time again, every ambitious introvert ends up in situations where being extroverted is a must. Even if they’re introverts, it doesn’t prevent them from switching into extrovert mode. By reflecting upon themselves and others, they can learn to adapt to various different situations, and to switch to extroversion when required.

Companies should not create workplaces tailored only to extroverts.

Many employers believe that their employees work best when their workplaces are tailored to the ideal of an extrovert. They, however, overlook one key difference: big groups may be behind great successes, but the actual work generally does not take place in meeting rooms. Rather, developers usually sit at home, alone, in front of their computer screens.

Modern workplaces make extroverts happy. However, companies risk their full potential if they ignore introverted employees.

The key is to provide both extroverts and introverts with a suitable environment, giving employees the chance to exchange ideas but also to withdraw and experience solitude.

A truly skilled leader can unite the talents of introverts and extroverts.

It can be argued that, in a workplace, an extroverted leading style is ideal when the goal is to complete simple tasks as quickly as possible. However, introverted leadership qualities are imperative if team members want to get involved and contribute their own ideas.

Extroverted leaders make quick decisions based on little information. Whereas, introverted leaders usually accumulate a lot of information before making a decision.

Each personality type has skills the other can profit from. Both temperaments can maximize their performance through cooperation. Interactions between introverts and extroverts often lead to misunderstandings. During conflicts, extroverts tend to grow aggressive, overwhelming introverts. Introvert retreats from an open conflict because of its unpleasantness – which the extrovert often interprets as a lack of interest.

It need not be extroverts vs. introverts. Both temperaments can complement each other. Every once in a while, extroverts also prefer deep conversations, and introverts can be inspired by the liveliness of extroverts. They can work together to achieve great goals if they try to open up and understand each other’s perspective.

Ruchika Verma

You can purchase this wonderful book from Amazon